Hey Yu En,
Thanks for everything!
By the time you see this carefully worded email, I had already let go and moved on forward. The past long one month was enough to emote my feelings of bereavement. I have a tough time editing and re-editing this email to you. I didn’t know whether you would read it or even respond to it. Today is the first 30 days after our breakup. I have to say, I didn’t appreciate the manner you conducted our breakup, via phone. I guess it’s time to leave every sad memories and lost hope to the month of April and start the month of May without the burden of the past.
What I wish or hope for doesn’t matter anymore, at least to you. I have made mistakes in the past, everyone does, and now I’m receiving the consequences. You have made your choice, whether pressured by family or voluntarily. I can tell that you have been under tremendous stress lately, pardon me if I inadvertently contribute to your stress. I know whatever I say couldn’t undo any of my past inconsiderate attitude that caused you unhappiness. Like I say before, I’ll stay on only if I can make you happy. Since I did not manage to do so, it’s time to end the relationship.
I don’t want to blame you, myself or the world. If we’re not meant to be together, there’s no point in persisting and create unhappiness to the one I love. If we’re meant to be together, then we will be together.
I have no regrets in the past going to whatever extent and effort to maintain my first relationship. I know I had tried my very best to win your heart. My only regret is that whatever I did wasn’t enough to convince you that I’m the right guy. Of course, there will always be rooms for improvement and I will learn to become a better person. I think both of us learnt important lessons that we won’t repeat in our future relationships. I will definitely find a better girl next time so will you.
We started off as strangers, but I really don’t hope to end like that. I don’t know how but I really hope we can still be on good mutual terms, if that is ever truly possible. Your decision may have ended my love for you. But my care for you still exists unless you think otherwise. Thus, I would like you to know, if ever you need a friend to share your happiness or sorrow, I’ll always be there to listen, as your loyal friend. Right now, we don’t owe each other anything, so anything that goes from here should come out freely from our hearts and souls.
You’ll be working professional soon, should you require anything at all, really anything at all, I’d be happy to offer my assistance. I’d like to continue MSN chat or skype with you like before. We can crap whole nite and talk about MOs and Specialists and discuss medical managements. We can still share thoughts about other people, whenever you’re ready.
P.S. If I couldn’t wish for long term friendship with you, at least I would wish you happiness in your future path. All the best and good luck in whatever you do. I will always pray for your well being and happiness. I always pray to God to guide me to be a better person and make me know Him more. May God bless you.
Your loyal friend always,
Gary Lee Chong Chearn
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